In an effort to “strengthen community,” Apex Meridian Holdings has expanded its Culture Committee, a once-harmless group originally tasked with choosing donut flavors for Staff Appreciation Day. Today, the committee wields more influence than three VPs and the entire Finance department combined.
What started as a brainstorming meeting for “employee engagement” has evolved into a sprawling political ecosystem. Members now run subcommittees for Wellness, Gratitude, Positivity Enforcement, and something mysteriously named The Vibe Council.
Leadership hasn’t objected—mostly because executive decisions now require Culture Committee approval. Last week, the CFO attempted to update the company’s travel policy but was overruled for “insufficient sparkle.”
Employees report mixed feelings. Some appreciate the weekly Mandatory Cheer Circles; others worry about being drafted into the Committee’s new cross-functional Dance-Off Task Force.
When asked whether the Committee had overstepped its authority, the CEO responded carefully, stating, “We fully trust the Culture Committee. They are listening right now.”
Rumor has it next month’s agenda includes rewriting everyone’s job titles to include “Ambassador of Joy.”
